There are some conversations that stay with you long after they’ve ended—and my recent live with Dr Tara Porter is one of them. Dr Tara Porter is a clinical psychologist, author, and therapist specialising in both individual and couple work. With 28 years’ experience in the NHS, she brings deep expertise in therapy, education, and the emotional health conversations that truly matter.
If you haven’t watched the replay yet, I really encourage you to make time for it. It was rich, real, and deeply moving. Tara brought such depth and compassion to every answer, and I know from the flood of messages we’ve had since that so many of you felt truly seen.
We covered so much—from perfectionism and body image to how early relationships with food can quietly shape our adult habits. And, of course, we spoke about the heavy cloak of “not enoughness” that so many carry without even realising.
One part of the live that really resonated, and clearly struck a chord with many, was about emotional inheritance—how the things said (or unsaid) in childhood can echo through the decades. Whether it’s a critical parent or a culture obsessed with thinness, so much of what we internalise as truth simply… isn’t.
Tara offered a beautiful piece of therapeutic advice that I wanted to highlight again here: write the letter. Not to send, but to express. Say everything you’ve wanted to say. Then, sit with it. Edit it. Reflect on it. Burn it if you like. But get it out of your head and onto paper. It’s a powerful way to take back control of the narrative.
For me, it brought up the memory of what I now call my “F-off shield.” A boundary I had to build for myself when I realised I could no longer carry the emotional weight others were trying to place on me. It’s something I still lean into now and again, especially when old patterns try to creep back in.
And this is the thing—healing isn’t about being perfect. It’s about being human. It’s messy, and wobbly, and brave. And it’s okay if your version of progress doesn’t look like anyone else’s.
Tara’s words reminded us that eating behaviours—whether it’s restriction, bingeing, or reward eating—are rarely about food. They’re about emotions. Protection. Punishment. Comfort. And when we can meet those parts of ourselves with curiosity instead of criticism, something shifts.
You are not broken. You’ve just never been taught another way. And that’s exactly what Slimpod, and voices like Tara’s, are here to offer—a gentler, kinder path back to yourself.
If you’d like to explore this journey further, my book The Weight’s Over – Take Back Control is a great place to start. It’s full of tools and insights to help you reclaim your relationship with food and feel good in your body again.
And if Tara’s words resonated with you, you might want to explore her books Good Enough and You Don’t Understand Me—both offer beautiful guidance on self-worth, emotional wellbeing, and raising emotionally resilient young people.
You can find Tara’s books here.
